LAUGH.

2009-12-17T03:04:00.000-08:00

i miss amandacharmainejessee.....................................................................................................................................................

wah

2009-12-17T02:37:00.000-08:00

I have just sent an email. To someone who cares.
*:D*

She's a girl you doofuses.
Don't get the wrong idea. Cause' you're wrong. Hohoho.

It took me so long to type, it's a crime. (hehe)
I feel immense satisfaction.
Ah.

Honest-to-goodness-ly,
Beeaaaat.

GOD BLESS WHOEVER WHO READS THIS.
HOHOHO.

i feel bad.
God bless everyone else too.

*bing!*
*emergence of the super grin*

2009-12-03T06:50:00.000-08:00

"A son and his father were walking on the mountains.

Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

"To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating, somewhere in the mountain: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"

Curious, he yells: "Who are you?"

He receives the answer: "Who are you?"

And then he screams to the mountain: "I admire you!"

The voice answers: "I admire you!"

Angered at the response, he screams: "Coward!"

He receives the answer: "Coward!"

He looks to his father and asks: "What's going on?"

The father smiles and says: "My son, pay attention."

Again the man screams: "You are a champion!"

The voice answers: "You are a champion!"

The boy is surprised, but does not understand.

Then the father explains: "People call this ECHO, but really this is LIFE.

It gives you back everything you say or do.

Our life is simply a reflection of our actions.

If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart.

If you want more competence in your team, improve your competence.

This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life;

Life will give you back everything you have given to it."

YOUR LIFE IS NOT A COINCIDENCE. IT'S A REFLECTION OF YOU!"-- Unknown Author

just something i found :)

2009-11-28T20:41:00.000-08:00

My Ex-Best Friend
by Celestie Vaughn

we were always together
me and you
joined at the hips
like siamese twins
you always saved a seat for me
you always gave me a share of what you had
you always helped me out with whatever problems i faced
and i did the same towards you too
you were once my sole confidante

my sister
whom i told everything

but soon
i slowly realised
you never told me anything
anything at all
you never shared with me
who you liked
who you thought was cool and who was not
who you thought
sang the best songs
you only told me
others' views
not your own

i found out
who you were crushing on
through your sibling
i still can
imagine her shock
*you're-her-best-friend-and-you-don't-know?!*
i still can imagine
the disappointment
that was clearly etched onto my face
feeling of being trusted
and loved
and appreciated
by a best friend
i never got to experience that

you used to shout to me
once you saw me
acknowledging my presence
your whole face lighting up
with the widest grin in the world

then
one day
i walked into class
late,as usual
and for once
i didn't have anywhere to sit
because you were with somebody else
someone who meant more to you
than i did
i asked you
whether the seat on the other side of your friend
was empty

but,no
it wasn't
because it was saved
for somebody
who was of greater importance to you
it was as if
an invisible hand
had entered the window
and grabbed hold of my heart
ceasing the function of every system in my body

after that
you don't even pretend to see me
you just walk straight pass me
like i'm part of the wall
an invisible being
whom nobody cares for
like the kind of boring flyer
that you would just carelessly toss aside
without a single glance

now
i know
that i never meant as much to you
as much as you did to me

alas
the trace of the bond
which held us together
fades away into nothingness

nobody who see us now
would even know
we were
the best of pals
the last faint trace
is there no longer

to the world
we are just
merely
acquaintances.

*******

just something i found.

i thought it'd be pretty heart-wrenching if that happened to me.

what do you think of it?

god bless!

which would you choose? which would you feed?

2009-08-30T02:54:00.000-07:00

THE TWO WOLVES

A Native American grandfather was talking to his grandson about how he felt. He said, "I feel as if I have two wolves fighting in my heart. One wolf is the vengeful, angry, violent one. The other wolf is the loving, compassionate one." The grandson asked him, "Which wolf will win the fight in your heart?" The grandfather answered: "The one I feed."

I TOTALLLY COPIED AND PASTED THIS POST FROM JES' BLOG! AM I LAZY OR WHAT? (sorry jessee :))(u noe i love you) :)

2009-08-30T02:04:00.000-07:00

Today was totally awesome ! You know why?

Coz I woke up at 1? No....
Coz I ate Italian for breakfast? No...
Coz I can fly? No... That'll be cool though

But it's because...

I was with the A.B.C.J.J.W (Asian Born Chinese Junior Jakun Wuliaos)
Amanda Beatrice Charmaine JesSee Jessica and Winny !!

WE ... went to perform at Monash University for their talentime !
It was so cool ... It had a circus theme and the audience were THE BOMB !!

They cheered and responded to EVERYTHING ! I love them !!

Our performance was awesome ! Will upload tons of pics and videos soooon ... I did a blunder here and there ... SORRY !!

All in all, it was fun and the whole experience was overwhelming ! We camehored alot ! Mostly SIokSendiri-ing and damn__we are POSERS and proud of it!! XD

Can't wait for another performance ...

Oh SHOOT ... It's 2.23 am... I gtg sleep now

Tata~

To ABCJJW:
Please upload EVERYTHING you have ... And so will I ... I had TONS of fun and I hope you did too =P

from fairytalejes.blogspot.com

okay, now for my own upload.

God Bless You! :D

this shall keep you entertained:

The international food shortage
Recently, a worldwide survey was conducted and the only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about the solution to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was, not surprisingly, a huge failure. Because:
In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.

In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.

In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.

In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.

In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.

In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.

And, in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.

*grins*

And now for the reaaal deal :D : hope you enjoy what i found.

Chopsticks

A woman who had worked all her life to bring about good was granted one wish: "Before I die let me visit both hell and heaven." Her wish was granted.

She was whisked off to a great banqueting hall. The tables were piled high with delicious food and drink. Around the tables sat miserable, starving people as wretched as could be. "Why are they like this?" she asked the angel who accompanied her. "Look at their arms," the angel replied. She looked and saw that attached to the people's arms were long chopsticks secured above the elbow. Unable to bend their elbows, the people aimed the chopsticks at the food, missed every time and sat hungry, frustrated and miserable. "Indeed this is hell! Take me away from here!"

She was then whisked off to heaven. Again she found herself in a great banqueting hall with tables piled high. Around the tables sat people laughing, contented, joyful. "No chopsticks I suppose," she said. "Oh yes there are. Look - just as in hell they are long and attached above the elbow but look... here
people have learnt to feed one another".

Godblessyou:D

the following tale is of utmost high importance!

2009-06-18T05:30:00.000-07:00

> > Importance: High> > >

While a man was polishing his new car, his 4 yr old son picked a stone & scratched lines on the side of the car.

In anger, the man took the child's hand & hit it many times, not realizing he was using an iron wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.

When the child saw his father.... with painful eyes he asked: 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?'

The man was very hurt and speechless, he went back to car and kicked it a lot of times.

Devastated by his own actions, sitting in front of that car, he looked at the scratches .

The child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'.

The next day that man committed suicide.

Anger and Love have NO LIMIT - choose the latter to have a beautiful lovely life.... THINGS are meant to be USED and PEOPLE are to be LOVED..but the problem of today's world is that...

People are used. & Things are loved!!!

Bear with me, watch this.

2009-08-29T08:17:00.000-07:00

PLEASE
PLEASE
PLEASE

CLICK ON THE FOLLOWING LINK.

YOU MIGHT EVEN CRY! :D

NOPE, NOTHING SCARY, DON'T WORRY OTHERWISE I WON'T EVEN BE LOOKING.

BUT PLEASE, I THINK IT'S NOTHING SHORT OF INSPIRATIONAL.
:D

2009-08-25T08:14:00.000-07:00

sorry for the horde of emo posts.

heeheee. (:

but you know i love you.

well, even if i don't, God does :D

even if you're thinking of the most horrible thing to do, the nastiest thing to do,

God still loves you!
because...

God loves us, forever! :D

empty.void.null.

2009-08-22T09:56:00.000-07:00

how would you feel
if something that you've been trying for since form1
committed yourself to
aiming for it so much
that you even sort of kept low on other stuff just for it
since form1, remember that
4 whole entire years

and wham!

it smacks you in the face.
just.
like.
that.

there's nothing you can do
but wonder

what might've happened if you'd taken a different route
an alternative way

if you'd accepted the scholarship and gone abroad when you could, if only you could afford it
if you'd stayed in the school that you were supposed to go to instead of shifting to another secondary school back in f1

what would've happened if i was rejected from entering the school?
good,no?

what if?

and

why me?

i can only wonder.

and
God bless you,

you

and you.

i should shift to SU or smtg.
then i could walk to school.

the end or the beginning?

2009-08-21T07:53:00.000-07:00

"... Not in this set-up, this environment, this time..."

After all that has been said and done,
after decisions have been made,
after feelings have been expressed,

I really have nothing to say.

If my heart were a bucket it'd be full with different colour,
each symbolising a different feeling, a different perspective.

I don't know if this teacher'll ever read this, but thank you.
For the 3Ps and 2Rs I'm going to face in my life, I'll always remember that you were there to prevent me from going .... somewhere else.

But

It's so hard, teacher.
After you said it, I was quite.. pumped up :D I thought it's be rather.. simple? Well, not THAT hard..
But once I began talking to others, seeing things happening,
it's just so tough, so, so tough.

It's so hard to respond.

Sorry.

But I'll try. I'll conquer it.

Watch me.

A friend sent this to me:
"...continue seeking for God's guidance and rmb to put Him above all :D..."

Thanks, Em.

I also realised that I have lost a friendship, or rather goodfriend-ship.
But I have gained others.
Maybe you, maybe not.
Thanks

leeyuinemilyrushandiane

You guys rock.

DUH.

:D

Lastly, go for CF makan tmr! Don't know whether I can go, sorry Cf orangs! :D
oh pfft. Just thought of a reason why I shouldn't go.
But exaactly for that reason I should go :D

See you there!

Quote Tzi Ying:
God loves us, forever!

Thanks for forever embedding that line in my mind :)

Thanks everybody!

Quote a wonderful teacher:
".......be the best in whatever position you are, be it the leader, the sub-leader, the department leader or even just the follower, be the best in whatever position you are..."

Quote Pn Joyce:
".......In this case, that's the right line to say........"

Thank you God for bringing all these wonderful people into my life!

the last day of PMR 08' (super outdated sial) the day my camera got abused .

2009-06-13T07:33:00.000-07:00

it was the last day of PMR.

the afternoon of our #1 evil scheme.

(though now it won't be called that lah)

(heh. super inside joke.)

(so many people seem to be posting this:'inside joke.', so I'm doing it too.)

(Waaaaaa.)

After bathing:

lepas mandi

You are about to witness the abuse of my lovely sexy camera.
You have been warned.
*Lynnie don't kill me*

abuse of my beautiful camera

And now...

gah. Miss Chia has great and amazing potential.....

at taking horrible photos.

example as shown below:

then we went to Pyramid:

F.O.S.

Perfecto example of her cute little round 'ss' face.
(Go ahead, look at what shape her face is)
And the super cute cross earrings.

....it's a circular face.
hah.
:)

Me , my dulan face(as jo would put it)
and the scary looking cross earrings.

I'm holding hands with a dummy.
whaddacrapp.

She's posing with her dummy friends.
*teeheehee*

Next,of all places, we were in....

...Popular.(or was it MPH?)

(hold it hold it hold it.)

(MPH.)

in which we saw this:

(lynnie forced me to take a picture of them kayy)

and now the lady herself:

she didn't want to be the only one 'ss-ing', so I kena pulak.

NEXT!

I think this was in Living Cabin or something like that.

(they sell fake fruits here, justin)

heh. inside joke.

i loveeee typing that line.

*dulan face*

Glass-I mean- plastic boots for sale!

First she saw yellow:

I kena again:

Then I saw pink.

I kena again:

cos' she wanted to take as well.

*super dulan face*

...but she's so cute, who can resist taking more?

*sighs*

*poor camera*

*oh miss chiaaa don't kill meeeeeee*

To 'bodek' her out of killing me, I resort to this:

YES, YOU!
Yes, I do :)

Next, as we all know,

Everyday is Mother's Day!

So this is to our mommies,

love from us!
I know I look sucky okay

'specially next to the model-ballerina-dancer-choreographer Miss Chia.

Don't say a word :)

*grins*

And 'cos we're on a low budget,

we head to Juscooooo.

We hated the neon coloured one.(refer pictures below)

She ripped the neon one off her body

(wow, what an image)

right after she tried it on

cos' she claimed she looked horrible in it.

Tak sempat take photo .

But I was like "Aiyaa, who cares man?"

haha kawan best konon :D

I wore her 'leftover' and took picture in it anyway.

ahh! abuse! :)

smoking hot ladyyy

then I returned with a white one, so yeah :)

I know I'm both fat and flat,

just keep it low okayy.

shhhh....

This was super spontaneous:

I didn't even realise this was taken:

....But all I know is that it further affirms the fact

that Lynnie has great potential to take horrible pictures. hohoho :)

And last but not least, the last few pictures of the day..

We terpaksa balik like at 5pm cos' Lynnie ade ballet :)

This post is dedicated to Miss Chia Yune-Lyn(since I owe her a birthday post from last year :))

My smashingly sexaayy and hottt Lynnie

(you can't see much of her 'hot' bits here, but take my word for it) :D

For all the times we spent together , (and didn't)

Here's to hoping that we'll spend more time in each other's presence!

(this sounds weird, but oh well!)

here's to our next evil plan!

I should blog more.

It's very... soothing.

Calming.

Relaxing.

Makes me happy :)

Loves & God bless.

"The Lord be with you!"

-Boaz from Ruth 2:4

Yes, yes indeed.

2009-06-12T22:47:00.000-07:00

this is quite cool :)

Yesterday is history.

Tomorrow is mystery.

Today is a gift.

That's why it's called the present.

woohoo :)

still sad,

cos you have someone else

besides me

who is cooler

hipper

funner(and funnier)

free-er

more time to go out

more time to sms

more time to spend

with you.

same class

as you.

perhaps this is for the better?

only time will tell.

and God.

peace out.

Triple Filter Test

2009-06-12T22:34:00.000-07:00

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said,

"Socrates, do you know what I just heard about your friend?"

"Hold on a minute,"Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test.
It's called the Triple Filter Test."

"Triple Filter?"

"That's right,"Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say.

The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is absolutely true?"

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and...."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued," you want to tell me something bad about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though, because there is still one filter left : the filter of Usefulness. Is that what you want to tell me about my friend useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"

eek.sorry smun. belum reply lagi >.<

(this is the 2nd time i'm using this : >.<)

(okay that's the 3rd :D)

100 truths, tagged by dear mandaaaaa :)

2009-06-05T21:18:00.000-07:00

Here it goes....
001. Real Name: Beatrice Low Wei Jin
002. Nickname(s): Beat, Rice, Beat-rice, Pukul beras, pukul nasi, dafan, PB
003. Age: 15+
004. Horoscope: Sagittarius
005. Gender: Female
006. Elementary: Ringrose Kindergarten
007. Primary School: SK Subang Jaya
008. Secondary School: Seafield :D
009. College: Too young
010. Hair Color: Black and Brown :P
011. Hair Length: quite long
012. Loud or Quiet: Depends
013. Sweats or Jeans : Jeans
014. Phone or Camera: Both :P
015. Health Freak: Sometimes
016. Drink or Smoke: Nope
017. Do you have a crush on someone: Think so
018. Eat or Drink: Eat and drink XD
019. Piercings: Ears
020. Tattoos: None
021. Social or Anti-Social: No idea :P
022. Righty or lefty: Righty
023. First piercing: 5+, on ears
024. First relationship: hah. xD
025. First Best Friend: Saw Mei Yi
026. First Award: Ballet Lower Primary Honours XD
027. First Kiss: Nope
028. First Pet: Fish?
029. First Big Vacation: err.to Malaysia when i was two.
030. First Love at first sight: Don't think so
031. First Big Birthday: long time ago in London
032. First Surgery : No
033. First sport you joined: Ballet
034. Orange or Apple juice: Mango!
035. Rock or Rap: Depends
036. Country or Screamo: Country.du-uh.
037. NSYNC or Backstreet boys: Backstreet boys.
038. Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera: Britney Spears
039. Night or Day: Day
040. Sun or Moon: i donno :D
041. TV or Internet: Both :P
042. Playstation or XboX: Playstation
043. Kiss or hug: Hug
044. Iguana or turtle: Turtle
045. Spider or bee: Neither!
046. Fall or spring: Fall
047. Limewire or iTunes: Don't use either one =='
048. Soccer or baseball: Soccer
049. Eating: Anything goooooood:D
050. Drinking: Anything gooooooood :D preferably mango.
051. Excitement level: Normal.I think.
052. I'm about to: Pee :)
053. Listening to: nothing......
054. Plan for today: BK class
055. Waiting for: My tun to be the freaking slimmest :P
056. Energy Level: Normal.I think
057. Thinking of someone: Guess so.
058. Want kids : Yeah.
059. Want to get married: Think so.
060. When: When the time comes lah
061. How many kids do you want: 1 or 2 or 4
062. Any name on the mind: Not yet
* 063 & 064 is missing *(because it was stated on da's blog, so yeah)
065. Mellow future or wild: Er..don't know :P
066. Something you would never try: Something that will destroy my life

067. Which is the better in the boy/girl you like(in the future):
068. Lips or Eyes: Eyes
069. Romantic or Funny : Both.
070. Shorter or Taller: Taller.
071. Protective or Caring?: Both.
072. Romantic or Spontaneous: Romantic.
073. Nice Stomach or Nice Arms: Both.
074. Sensitive or Loud: Both
075. Hook-up or Relationship: err?
076. Trouble Maker or Hesitant: Hesitant.
077. Muscular or normal: Normal.

078. Kissed a stranger: No way.
079. Broken a bone: Nope.
080. Lost glasses or contacts: Yes.
081. Ran away from home: Nahh.
082. Held a gun/knife for self defense: Both XD
083. Killed somebody: No!
084. Broken some one's heart: err.i guess.
085. Had your heart broken: not exactly, but yeah.
086. Been arrested: So far nope :P
087. Cried when someone died: Yeah.
088. Liked a friend more than a friend: Yeah :D
089. Do you believe in Yourself: i would like to believe so.
090. Miracles: Yes, because Jesus is always there :D
* 091 is missing * (once again, because it was missing from da's post)
092. Heaven: Yes.
093. When do you want to die: When the time comes :P
094. Tooth Fairy: Nope.
095. Kiss on the first date: Nope.
096. Angels: Yeah.
097. Is there 1 person you want to be with right now?: yup
098. Are you seriously happy with where you're in life now: Kinda.
099. Do you believe in God: Duh.
100. Post as 100 truths and tag 10 people.

Chai Shing Yin
Chew Sue Mun
Chia Yune-Lyn
Emily Chan Sze Yin
Fong Zhen Ying
Kenneth Wong
Lim Wei Qi, Callie
Seng Yee Leng
Sim Ee Huei, Diane
Voon Li Teng

Hohoho:) alphabetical order XD

lastly....

happy belated 16th birthday yuva! (aka annei) :)

happy 17th birthday edward goh!

happy beearliered birthday fong zhen ying!

happy beearliered birthday shaun chien!

lazy to type di.

nxt person who reads this better post something in the cbox

otherwise, for the kazillionth time, i'll be tempted to delete this blog XD

p.s.

i WILL conquer it.

2nd day of MCE. when i'm supposed to be at a wedding dinner. which nobody knows I am.

2009-06-02T03:50:00.000-07:00

i could melt

and nobody would realise.

god bless.

Regret?

2009-05-26T05:23:00.000-07:00

"Aieeek! Too hot-lah. Wait on the grass first-lah," I thought.

My mind flashedback to 3 years ago - when we were all little first formers. I recalled being right at the same spot - 3rd runner, as always - thinking along the exact same lines.I remember going down to the track at 10 something every sports day to check my lane for any sharp objects. We always ran about 15 minutes later, about 10.15. The latest would certainly be about 10.30 or 10.40, when the Sun could barely lick our skin. Definitely. It would never ever be later than that. The tracks definitely won't be hot. Definitely. No doubt about that. Got that?

"Lorong 4! Lorong 4 mana?"

"Sini, cikgu!" I replied jovially.
Wow, the track's REALLY hot.

"Cepat-lah masuk trek.. dah nak mula ni...!" Cikgu Musawir's 'merajuk' voice came from behind me.

"Panas-lah, cikgu!"

"Apa ni.. panas panas.. cikgu pun panas lah..!"

then..

"BANG!!!"

The gun-shot. The start of a race.

I hurried into my lane. Gosh, this is waaaaay hotter than when we were in Form 1. It was the first time I was running in my first year in a new school.. and I frequently revisited the memory of the adrenaline rush that raced through my blood from the second the baton entered my grip till it left my hand for the finish line.

Hmm.. I wonder whether we will do as well as the previous years?
Perhaps not.
Will we win?
Can we win?

My eyes were focused on Yune-Lyn.

At that moment, as I saw her long legs racing round the first bend, I felt instant admiration. This was the girl who said she couldn't sprint. This was the girl who we begged to join the relay to help us, beacuse there was no one else we could depend on. We knew she could do it, but apparently she didn't think so. And once she was registered as part of the team, she went to ask for help - from her pet brother, to our house captain, to almost every sprinter she knew. And while yours truly was dancing away at gymrama training, here she was, right here in MPSJ, 'learning' how to sprint, although she already could. If that isn't admirable enough, I don't know what is.

She was running, for the first time in her life, in a sprinting event - and here she was, leading the way.

Then it was Liesl's turn to shine.

Liesl, the funkeyh monkeyh, who injured her (was it?) tailbone when we were back in Form 1. Injury, after injury... Form 2 as well... She could run, but she still couldn't run run. Then Form 3, - at last. The first runner who lead us off to an explosive start last year. It was as if she was never injured. And this supermonkey injured (or was it a pull?) her thigh muscle which was aggravated by her participation in long jump. Liesl wasn't even sure whether she was able to sprint on the sports day, which, by a twist of blessing, she was able to. Yes, indeed, God is awesome.

She was leading - all the way - and then it was my turn to perform. It was up to what I did whether the Red shirt emerge victorious around the third and fourth bend.

The tracks were hot. Real hot.

"UP!"
I started running.

"Pap!"
The baton was in my hand, it was up to me what I did with it.

So I ran.

I ran like I had never run before - and I could tell that I wasn't slowing down at all, unlike the previous years when I could practically feel my energy leaving me.

The shouts, the yells of my hooligan-friends, so many audible voices, so many familiar voices that I even as I ran, I could tell who was shouting and from where. So, so many -

"This track is really hot!" My mind was yelling."HOT!!!HOTT!!!! Now I know why so many people were saying it was so hot. I hadn't imagined this at all!"

The heat was literally burning into my soles, the faster I ran, the quicker the heat tore through my toes.

"Faster, Beatrice, faster! The faster you reach, the faster you rest!!!" My feet screamed.

Must. go . faster. Pain..

I was still leading, but all that was in my head was pain, pain pain pain PAIN.

Winning? What's that?

I could barely concentrate on where I was running, all that I thought about was the scorching flame that were consuming my feet bit by bit.

I....must...finish....

I couldn't think anymore. I forgot to say 'UP' to Se Yieng, our faithful fourth runner. I barely saw where I placed the baton. I could barely think about anything but -

Something red flashed in the Sun, on it's way to the ground.
The baton.

I couldn't think. My hand instinctively went down, grabbed it and put it into Se Yieng's waiting hand.

Something so crucial, that people would normally groan at while watching, something so BIG -
bur barely registered in my mind.

I stumbled over to the grassy part of the field. Must....sit.....down.....Faster....

I fell to my butt, my teeth gritted, my hands clenched and gripping the grass on the field like they were going to save my life. The soles of my feet were going to fall off any moment.

"Pain.. pain.." was all that I could mutter.

But no tears came. No surprise. Pain, so what? Your own fault, for not wearing shoes to ru-

"Se Yieng!" A voice suddenly said. Who was it? Oh, me.

"Who won? How did red house do? What place we got?" I heard myself asking anxiously, nervously.

The comforting bodies around me hushed me, saying that my feet were alright, I was going to be fine-

The baton. The baton! THE BATON! I DROPPED THE BATON!

Something that I couldn't understand why so many people did, it was so simple, so easy, just passing a hollow tube into the hands of somebody else..

Or rather, passing on the hope and expectations to emerge triumphant unto the next person, who in turn was going to prove whether the hopes will stand or will fall.

And I had dropped it.

The salty stream started flowing freely down my cheeks- I had let my house down, I had let my house captain down, I had let my faithful teammates down, they - who had done nothing wrong at all, I had let my friends down. The people who were constantly there, ever supporting me. I had let people - who I knew were banking on me to go further - down. Down, down, down.

I gave into the emotions of being the one who let down others.

Most of all, I had let myself down.

As I let myself be smothered by my friends who were trying to hush me - Lee Yuin's "breath in, breath out", Diane's "You okay or not?", Wen Min's "Beat, don't worry okay", Yee Fung's "Beeaaaaat", Justin's "Beat, don't crylah", the St Johns, Brenda's extremely worried face.......
(please do let me know if i left your name out, because I'm in a rush to finish this post, so I'm just typing anything that comes to mind..hold on. not like anyone's going to read this anyway. It's just going to be me, myself and I. HOHOHO. Anyway. just let me know, kay, now- back to story)

I felt anguished, dismayed, almost distraught. Yet at the same time so touched and basking in the love that my friends shared.

Until I caught a glimpse of a watch.

12.45 pm.

The numbers jumped out at me.

What?

What happened to 'definitely'?

I looked towards the sky and was blinded by the rays of light emanating from the Sun which was directly above my head.

I looked at my toes - now red and burnt - I saw the blood slowly seeping out from the gigantic circle beneath my big toe, where the skin already exposed the raw meat.

And cried.

2009-05-02T21:40:00.000-07:00

The SON
This is great. Take a moment to read it; it will make your day!
The ending will surprise you.
Take my Son
A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art..
When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.
About a month later, just before Christmas,
there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.He said, 'Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art.' The young man held out this package. 'I know this isn't much. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this.'
The father
opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture. 'Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift.'
The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.
The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings. Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.
On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. 'We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?
There was silence.
Then a voicein the back of the room shouted, 'We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one.'
But the auctioneer persisted. 'Will somebody bid for this painting? Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?'
Another voice angrily. 'We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Gogh's, the Rembrandts. Get on with the real bids!'
But still the auctioneer continued. 'The son! The son! Who'll take the son?'
Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room.. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. 'I'll give $10 for the painting..' Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.
'We have $10, who will bid $20?'
'Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters.'
The crowd was becoming angry.. They didn't want the picture of the son.
They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.
The auctioneer pounded the gavel. 'Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!'
A man sitting on the second row shouted, 'Now let's get on with the collection!'
The auctioneer laid down his gavel. 'I'm sorry, the auction is over.'
'What about the paintings?'
'I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.'
"The man who took the son gets everything!"
God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: 'The son, the son, who'll take the son?'
Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.
FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE...THAT'S LOVE.

loves.

pray for me people,

pray.

ifreakingwannagoformssm!!!!

sad :(

god bless youuuu :)

keep smiling :D

elated. at last.

2009-04-22T20:30:00.000-07:00

memories :)

tokyo 2008

i miss

at last..

can eat :)

loves.

god bless senior msss gimrama team.

although some may not deserve it.

God bless you.

awesome friday

2009-04-11T02:34:00.000-07:00

sorry for not updating for freeeaaking long time :)
and since so many people are blogging in almost-perfect english, i pun nak cuba lah.
so let's see how this post turns out.

anyway, Good Friday.
Friday the 10th.

I didn't go to school! *BIG GRIN*
don't worry mrs tay, i didn't ponteng.
due to training.

omigoshsothefreakingexhaustingitellyouuuuuu.

It started at about 8.30, finished at 11.30am, then I got ready to go to school.

I went for choir, CF, musical practice, then went home at 3.30 to prepare for tuition.
It was 4.58pm. I was in the car about 100 metres away from tuition when my phone began ringing like a crazy mango.

"BEAAAAT!!! We need you here at netball!!!"
It was Lee Yuin, one of the only bfs who can can actually start a phone conversation with me by deafening me first. Besides Ah-Lyn. Seriously.

So I skipped tuition, went for inter-school prefect games netball because they were 2 players short. *tsk rushan and diane tsk ffk-ers tsk* :D We got 2nd, lost to U4 in the finals.

It was really fun ,though. Seeing Sharon Rose Roberts attemting to balance on 1 leg to shoot, seeing the freaking accurate Tracey Lovett shoot again and again into the small little ring, seeing the equally tall Brynn Lovett jumpin out of nowhere to grab the ball, seeing Su Yin again (from debate), seeing U4's cute Centre, Izzatie(if not mistaken) attempting to drown U12's Centre in the pool of water on the field, seeing Filla Dalila shooting again and again, seeing Diana complain about the scary WA of U4(Su Yin. lol.) , seeing Usha and Sofeana doing their best to protect our side, seeing the shouting bf racing here and there trying to get us to score.

And of course, listening to Sharon's cries of "DON'T SHOOOOOOOOT!!!" across the field.
Farniness.

It was good to see the twins after so long. They were the first people I saw the second I walked into the USJ 8. These two hot, sexy, lanky, Eurasian twins. If you hug them , you won't be able to see anything except their shirt.

Or it may be just me.

Oh, PLUS they're great people. Freaking awesome.

Anyway, enough of them. I bet you're tired listening about them already.

I was really scared I would be pooped out like the day before when I went for gymrama training after playing basketball. Needless to say, coach was yelling at me, my calves were throbbing like.. mad mangoes, I could barely walk.

Fortunately, I made it through. I reached home after netball at about 7, training started at about 8 so it was kinda okay because we still had the warming up bit to do.
But coach was so freaking mad at (not me :D)(forgotten who) and training ended at...
11.
whaddacrapp.

Freaking exhausted.

"Dang, Saturday training 9am." was all that was echoing in my foolish little head as I climbed into bed.

But now..
the REAL reason why GOOD FRIDAYS are indeed, well, GOOD.

Initially, I was going to school because of CF's Court Case. But due to a teenyweeny,um, error, I ended up staying for choir..I don't know what difference it'll make anyway. The *insert appropriate name* dislikes me enough already.

Practice was terrible, as usual.

So I ended up running like a mad mango from the hall all the way to the Geography Room on the top floor of Block A. It didn't help that the room was right at the end of the corridor, either.

When I reached, the session was already closing.
But what I witnessed was more than enough to make up for missing the entire thing.

...Pastor Andy was asking for people who wanted to accept Jesus Christ into their heart to raise up their hands...
I squeezed my eyes shut.
Eunice took a deep breath.

And then I saw it.
Starting from the middle of the room, hands began popping up 'bagai cendawan tumbuh selepas hujan'.
And I am not exaggerating.
Almost half to 3/4 of the people present had their hands raised up.

My heart was jumping with joy and elation and everything else.

Indeed a sight to behold.

Eunice was tearing.
(I shall innocently fail to realise whether there were tears on my cheeks.)

Then Pastor Andy said, "I hope you all don't mind, but could all of you who raised your hands up just now to please stand up."

Almost everyone stood up, except for a small gang of people who were those CF orang-orang.

Among the faces of those who stood up that I instantly realised were Nick, Jian, Kai Ning.
(I hope you guys don't mind this.)

Praise the Lord.

Current statistics:
38 people accepted Christ, excluding the 27 who rededicated their lives unto Jesus.

This is the reason why Good Fridays aren't just good.
They're awesome.

Loves,

beatbeat.

off to shna's.

Aiieek.shna!mana rumah lu??!!

mssm quatic meet

2009-03-24T23:37:00.001-07:00

will update more soon.

loves

hmmm...

2009-03-15T06:11:00.000-07:00

"Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad."~ Norm Papernick

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it."
~ Fyodor Dostoevsky

"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet."~ James Openheim

"Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open."~ John Barrymore

"Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called."~ A.A. Milne

"There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second."~ Logan Pearsall Smith

"Pleasure is spread through the earthIn stray gifts to be claimed by whoever shall find."~ William Wordsworth

"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have."~ Frederick Keonig

“Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.” ~ Nathaniel Hawthorne

"There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness."~ Lady Blessington

"Real elation is when you feel you could touch a star without standing on tiptoe."~ Doug Larson

“Every individual has a place to fill in the world and is important in some respect whether he chooses to be so or not.”~Nathaniel Hawthorne

"So long as we can lose any happiness, we possess some."~ Booth Tarkington

"One joy scatters a hundred griefs."~ Chinese Proverb

"My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate."~ Thornton Wilder

"Be happy. It's one way of being wise."~ Colette

"Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is."~ Maxim Gorky

"Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for."~ Joseph Addison

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things."~ Robert Brault

"In order to have great happiness you have to have great pain and unhappiness - otherwise how would you know when you're happy?"~ Leslie Caron

"On the whole, the happiest people seem to be those who have no particular cause for being happy except that they are so."~ William R. Inge

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."~ Mahatma Gandhi

"When you're really happy, the birds chirp and the sun shines even on cold dark winter nights - and flowers will bloom on a barren land."~ Grey Livingston

"When you're really happy, the birds chirp and the sun shines even on cold dark winter nights - and flowers will bloom on a barren land."~ Grey Livingston

"Real happiness is cheap enough, yet how dearly we pay for its counterfeit."~ Hosea Ballou

"If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time. ~Josh Billings

"The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase: if you pursue happiness you'll never find it."~ C.P. Snow

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall. "~Confucius

"Every artist was first an amateur." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The only abnormality is the incapacity to love."~Anais Nin

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world."~Mahatma Ghandi

"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." ~Winston Churchill

"What a grand thing, to be loved What a grander thing still, to love" ~Victor Hugo

Crap. I'm short and fat.

Welcome back, SexyBeast!!!

Holdiays here we come,people! :D

ciao!

God Bless guys!!!

hmm.. well this is an emopost. i mean, emo commercial break post, whichever you prefer.

2009-03-05T04:33:00.000-08:00

*Commercial break!*

I'm sad.
Sorry.

Anyway, thanks guys..
err..refer cbox, you nosy people.

*Back to the show!*(Omigosh this is so lame)

Have you ever really wondered
What does it mean to have faith in yourself?

What is it?
What does it do to you?

Everybody says to believe in yourself.
Everybody says to trust yourself.

But how do you achieve that state of mind?
So strong, so firm , so solid that even a walking Taipei 101 can't bash through it?

I , I
think it all begins by believing in God and surrendering all you have unto him.
(Sorry atheists)
You may think : that's like relying on somebody else, depending on somebody else, when now you're supposed to be building faith in yourself. But have you ever stopped to think , that when we surrender all we have unto God, it means that we have that enormous leap of faith, that we have that gargantuan trust in ourselves which grows. And grows. And grows and grows and grows...

When your crush rejects you,
God will be there.
When your friends turn away from you,
God will be there.
When you fail again and again,
God will be there.
When nobody else loves you,
God will be there.

God doesn't fail anybody, even through the bleakest of times.
Even when you have nothing left, God will be there, right at your side, guiding you, loving you more than you have ever deserved.
God will be there to guide you into trusting and believing in yourself.

Having that rock solid faith in yourself will prevent you from straying too far away from the right path. You will dare to dream, dare to reach for the stars.

You will learn to push past the limits that you have set for yourself. Push beyond the expectations that everyone around you has set for you. Stretch your capabilities past the maximum because with God they can stretch on forever.

Then
you will be able to embrace your dream.
All you have to do
is to reach out
and grab it.

God Bless~

beeaaaaaaaat.

Watermelons.........and eggs

2009-02-14T14:52:00.001-08:00

These are truly incredible. You'll love the cool watermelons,but you'll be blown away by the eggs!

These egg shells were cut with a high intensity precision Laser Beam. This gives a very good idea of what can be achieved with a Laser Beam. This gives you an idea what laser surgery performed on one's eye is all about. Is it any wonder how one's vision can be improved in just a few moments? Science is sometimes wonderful, and it's still on the frontier of gaining new knowledge. Incredible what can be done with an eggshell and a laser beam.

'A true friend is someone who knows you're a good egg even if you're a little cracked.'

Of expectations and formulas for happiness

2009-01-31T01:24:00.000-08:00

Something that i read recently (to be more accurate, 1 minute ago) 'stimulated' my very empty thinking cap.

You know the way we hear a lot of

Don't expect anything so that you won't be disappointed.

And this is what I thought was really cool :) :-

To tell you the truth I think that quote is utter bullshit.And I'll tell you why.We NEED expectation in our daily lives.Without expectation,there can be no excitement.Without excitement,everybody will just be jaded and emotionless.Why not you just splash grey paint on the world and drown yourself in morphine,since you want to be so void of emotion.

-jotted by the one and only Farhan

tellmewhentowoah.blogspot.com

Okay, it's no that bad, yeah.

But think about it. How on earth do you expect one to live without expectations?

Even the daft-est person expects something, just that they expect daft things, of course.

I think it's pretty impossible to live trans expectations. How do you live, not expecting something? It'll be like living in an empty nutshell.. a small, black, damp, mind-cramping one, at that.

If you don't expect anything, it'll be akin to not dreaming, not hoping for something to happen. Even the most faithful people expect something .

Now that we're in the heat of this topic, the unquotable quote above , is in other words, one of the feeble attempts to come up with a formula in the pursuit of happiness. Indirectly.

But some 'ingenious' fellows came up with a so-called formulae for happiness, and made it public. Ever heard of it?

Pleasure + engagement + meaning = happiness.
This is one of them.

Another one :

Happiness = P + (5xE) + (3xH)

P stands for Personal Characteristics, including outlook on life, adaptability and resilience.
E stands for Existence and relates to health, financial stability and friendships.
And H represents Higher Order needs, and covers self-esteem, expectations, ambitions and sense of humour.
Sound complicated?

Apparently the formula was worked out by psychologists after interviews with more than 1,000 people.

So do you still belive in the formulas that scientists and researchers have came up with?

There are many more, by the way. Not only these two.

It's like they 'chi bao tai de kong'

(direct translation: too much free time after having their meal)

Now, back to the expectations thing.

So I don't think the quote should go: "Don't expect anything-"

more like:

"Lower your expectations-"
But then that won't be right anymore. Because if you lower your expectations, this means that you already know your initial 'level' of expectation. So you'll still be disappointed if the expected result doesn't come out because in your subconscious mind, you'll still be clinging on to the first expectation!
So what is the formula of happiness?
In my opinion-as if it weren't clear already- is that there simply isn't one.

Most people probably don't know what happiness is, they think happiness is perhaps having lots of money or a big car, or a big house. But people who have all these things are not necessarily happier than people who just enjoy their life.

We tend to be very obsessed with what is wrong, what is missing and what we have not got, rather than focusing on what we want and getting it. It would be nice to just enjoy your life, because life is a bit short.

Pete Cohen, who came up with the mathematics-like equation above(the PEH one), said:

Four in ten men said sex made them happy, and three in ten said a victory by a favourite sports team.
For seven in ten women happiness was related to being with family, and one in four said losing weight.
Romance featured higher for men than women. So did a pay rise and a hobby they enjoyed.
Women were more likely to cite sunny weather.

So does this mean we can come up with a formula with this
result?

C.P Snow once said:

The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase:if you pursue happiness,
you'll never find it.

We all can be happy in a heartbeat if we want to. Period.

Or rather,

If you want to be happy,be.
-Leo Tolstoy
And..
Happiness is never stopping to think if you are.
So even if happiness forgets you for a bit, never completely forget about it.

God Bless You~

Now, I'll seat back, go finish that bertimbun-timbun truckloads of homework,

and hope that people actually read this thing. :